The question of how many is too many?

I always had a suspicion that I drank just that little too much.

My father drank too much. I remember when I was young deciding that I didn’t want that in my life.  Sure I experimented, but I was always the sensible one.  The one that people could rely on.  I was the one that would always be ‘skipper’ on nights out with friends.

I can’t quite pinpoint when my drinking habits changed.  I think it was whilst I was living in New York, around the age of 35.  New York City is a strange place.  Bars and restaurants dominate.  All over the city, people live their lives either at work or in bars where they meet their friends and lovers for dinner, for drinks, to argue, to entertain and like me, to drown their sorrows.

I was terribly unhappy back then, working 12-14 hours a day.  I had a great job, was paid well, but something was missing.  I think I filled that “something missing” with alcohol.  I use to laugh about actually being a “functioning alcoholic”.  It doesn’t seem so funny now.

Being intent on losing this weight (which I suspect is there because of the wine and vodka), I have had to look at my relationship with alcohol.  You can lie to yourself about how much you drink when you don’t keep track, but when you track every single thing that goes in your mouth, it’s there in print.

The question I am currently asking myself is:  do I really have a problem, given how much I drink on a daily basis?  Time will tell, but I must admit that I am enjoying not waking up with a fuzzy head and feeling bloated.  I think there is hope.

Author: Carolyn Anna

I have a deathly fear of bees : I have a natural ballet 'turn-out' position : Most people think I walk like a duck : I use to hate my freckles when I was young, but now love them : I hate people calling me 'dude' : I have never been bitten by a spider or a snake or a horse or a dog : I never say 'cheers' at the end of a conversation or email : I always have to put on lip balm and get a glass of water before i go to bed :

5 thoughts on “The question of how many is too many?”

  1. Interesting – I think there are a lot of people in your situation. Stay strong and know that you can do it.

  2. I am very impressed with your honesty and I look forward to reading about your journey. Please, keep up the good work – I think with this blog, you may be able to help many people.

  3. Wow- I felt like I was reading my own thoughts. I’m doing WW too [found your blog from the forum] and before signing up to do WW, my husband & I would often joke about being alcoholics. I’ve been doing WW for a month and have never had more than 3 glasses of wine a week as opposed to splitting a bottle per night. Seeing our recycling bin almost half empty has been a huge eye opener.

  4. Thank you for sharing. I too questioned my relationship with alcohol when I started my weight-loss jourey. I realised there was no room for alcohol in my new lifestyle so gave it up. Very hard at first – I had been a teenage binge drinker, getting drunk all the time on waay to much that was remotely healthy. Anyhow, that was nearly a year ago now, and I have remained sober. For me, it was the best decision, not only weight-loss wise, but for my health and my mind. I hope you find a balance that works for you too. Betty x

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